Hey there, God,
This is the beginning of a long-overdue experiment. I have never been
very good at doing this, you know, devotions. I used to do a better job at home
with my family and through Bible Quiz at keeping in Your Word. But, since going
to college, I have not habitually been good at daily spending concentrated time
with You. Oh, I have gone to chapel, attended church, prayed and listened to
good music. But that’s like reading about You, hearing about You, and talking
about You without actually spending time with You. What a dumb idea!
This needs to change….I’m going to need Your help more than anything on this.
Help me please? I need the desire and ability for consistency. Show yourself to
me; today and each day. May my spiritual life and everyday life be unified in
You.
Love,
Laura
I wrote this on May 7, 2012 on the flight home from my first
year in college. It is the first entry in my prayer journal, which since then I
have been striving to make a habit in my life.
I’m not one of those people who insist you have to do devotions
at a certain time of day or night. What’s important to me is that I get them
done. Lately, I have been doing them by flashlight in my bunk before I go to sleep
each night at FaHoLo!
In addition to my
prayer journal (which was a gift from my roomie, Ashley), I have a ladies’
devotional book that has a scripture and a little reflection for each day
following a monthly theme such as joy, grace, humor or peace. This book was a
gift from Ryan. His encouragement to keep up with daily devotions is so
valuable. Right now I read that and then journal about what I read, my joys and
concerns of the day, my musings, and any interceding for friends and family.
I am not kidding when I said that I am not usually good at
this kind of thing. I am not! I am that kid that mom had ask me every night if my teeth were clean just
to make sure. She still has to bug me to put my shoes in the right place, or to
take my vitamins, or to make my bed or…..get the idea? Innate consistency is
just not something I excel at.
Yet, God has been
answering my prayer to give me “the desire and ability for consistency.” He
really has rewarded me each and every time I open up His Word and meditate on
it. Sometimes it’s the theme of the month that I really need to focus on, or a
sentence or phrase that stands out, or an idea approached in a brand new way.
For example, May 12th I wrote: “Dear God, You are hilariously amazing! Each
day this week you have rewarded me for my efforts to read and ponder Your Word
and to spend time with You.” That was the day I was at Teen Bible Quiz
regionals with my family. The passage I read that day talked about the power of
God’s Word. The little story in my devotional book was about this lady’s
mother, who memorized Scripture and shared it with her children. One day, this
mother asked her daughter if she wanted to listen to what she had been
memorizing. The daughter agreed and asked what she would be reciting. The
mother answered, “First Peter.” Yes, all of it! What is amazing is that the
material that TBQ is covering this year is Hebrews, First Peter and Second
Peter. Rachel has all of them memorized and was quizzing on this material that
day. It was just so fitting that I read that story that day. I was reminded of
the gift of quizzing and the power of God’s Word. It was beyond coincidence. It
was God.
That’s not the only time the “coincidence” has happened
either. God spoke about moving powerfully even in cramped quarters while I was
on an airplane in quarters that were definitely
cramped. He has spoken about not comparing myself and my spiritual health to
others or about rejoicing always when I could have easily been a complaining
mess….I could go on and on!
So, even though I have only been at this for about a month
and a half, I have met with God nearly every day since the day I began. Doing
this has strengthened me and given me the spiritual energy that I have needed
so desperately each day. Now I wonder why I waited so long. What was I scared
of? How did I convince myself that I couldn’t do devotions like other people
could? I think now about what I missed out on all those days I tried to do life
on my own strength. What opportunities did I miss? How much energy did I waste
being stubborn? What else will God show me now that I am intentionally being
faithful in seeking Him?
I think the best part about this process is that I really
can talk to God about anything. I know it is obvious, but you don’t quite
understand how important that is to me. I am a verbal processor! Anyone who
knows me can see why taking time to talk to God can be an incredibly safe and
healing thing. God is big enough to handle my concern, frustration, anxiety,
fear, and anger, as well as the perfect person to rejoice with and give praise
to. This also protects those around me from having to listen to absolutely everything
I ever think or need to process. It’s a win-win situation.
Scripture says that if we seek Him we will find Him if we
seek with all our hearts. Matthew says to “ask and you will receive, seek and
you will find, knock and the door will be opened to you.” I encourage you that
if you’re not actively seeking God daily through prayer and His Word, you’re
missing out. Take it from someone who knows (now). You don’t have to try to do
it the way that everyone else does it. If you don’t like to journal, don’t!
Draw pictures, make music, dance, or sit quietly and meditate. I don’t really
care how you meet with God, but I do
care that you try. If you don’t, you are missing out on the presence and gifts
of God in your life. Nothing is more important than Him--after all, he created everything else!